An Open Letter to My 21 - year old self
Dear Me@21,
Hi. You have
never seen or heard from me. But I know you since you were born.
I knew you
as a cute toddler and a cocky teenager. But recently I have been disappointed
by your attitude. You are turning into an insufferable know-it-all. And
trust me. You DON'T know it all.
The Internet
can only do so much. You know the price of everything but the value of nothing.
Sure you
have experienced the pain of physical illness and loss of a dear one. But you
have yet to experience heart break. There is no greater pain. But yes.
Frankly???? It does not last very long at your age.
You have
taken some people in your life for granted. Haven't you? You idiot!!! If you
learn anything worthwhile. Ever. You will learn not to do that. Well..... maybe
your parents. But that's it. No one else.
I noticed
you have started to tell people how sorted you are. Emotionally. It always
makes me laugh. Ha ha.You think you have it all sorted out? You haven't even
experienced complex emotions yet...... ‘knowing you are in love’, ‘feeling
angry that life is unfair’, ‘frustration when you witness injustice’, ‘hurt
of betrayal’, ‘the joy spending your first earnings’, ‘the utter
ecstasy of touching your new born’, ‘feeling torn between holding on and
letting go’. There is a whole lot coming your way my young self.
You think
you are mentally strong because criticism doesn't affect you? Well have you
faced false allegations with no chance of defending yourself? Do you know the
frustration of seeing 5 weeks of hard work flushed down the toilet because some
pompous arrogant man changed his mind? Have you felt the pain of seeing your
child in pain? Let's see how strongly you deal with that. Actually I have seen
how you would deal with it. Trust me. You did not fare well.
And what is
this compulsive need to have the last word every time? You think you have
learnt a lot. Then learn to "just shut up". And ‘when’ to shut up.
Maybe you have a thick skin and the spoken word hasn't hurt you yet. But
everyone's not like you. You will learn one day that kindness, polite words,
consideration for others' feelings and most importantly 'restraint' will take
you farther than any educational degree or awards.
The unspoken
word may sometimes be heard and appreciated. But the spoken word can never be
taken back. The world is full of people. We are an emotional, multi-talented
yet flawed species. We are social beings. We need acceptance. And No. We do not
have thick skins. The "we" includes you.
What are you
afraid of? Don't answer that. I know. You are afraid of being vulnerable.
Afraid of getting hurt. Afraid of failure. Afraid to fall in love. Afraid to
admit you are weak. But that's ok. Fear keeps us rooted. It doesn't make us
weak. Open up about your true feelings…. Just to yourself. It will take a load
off.
You are good
at expressing yourself. You will be appreciated for that in future. But ‘knowing’
words should be accompanied by the knowledge and wisdom of when to use them or
rather when ‘not’ to use them. Doesn't the wise "you" know that using
words or expressions like ‘shit’, ‘crap’, ‘screwed’ and ‘what the
f*ck’ are unacceptable in civil conversations with your family members..... Young
and old? Come on.
You are no
better or worse than those around you. Your money, education, profession,
opportunities, success will not define you. Only "you" will.
Too long a
lecture? Well it's not all bad. There is a lot in your favour. There is a lot I
envy about you. Youth, passion, dreams, energy, drive and a clean slate with
the freedom and opportunity to write what you desire.
Most important:
I don't
expect that you respond, agree, accept or appreciate what I said. But just remember
my words.
See you in
15 years.
In spite of
all my reservations, I know you will do just fine. Take care.
From
You@36.
